20-Odd-Years

I ask for an abundance of things
But I always seem to get
skipped over.
I didn’t surround myself with
things that made me happy…
they just didn’t make me sad.
I looked around to see the things
in my life –

I was in love with so many of them
You see… but NONE of them were me….

It’s been 20-odd years since I’ve seen the sunrise.
It’s been 20-odd years since I felt I was alive.
And I’ve never spent one day outside my mind.
It’s been 20-odd years and I’ve never lived one day in my whole life.

How could you ever think I could look up to you?
For all those things that you said and you did… the things you were never man enough to do.
And I look down to see the feet that crushed my dreams.

Then I begin to see, those feet belong to me….

(Chorus)

I have all these people in my life tellin me “You can’t be” .. but every song seems to be about me in everything I think and everything I dream and everything that NEEDS to be. I look up to see my people who need me and I need them so bad…

I’d say I just wanna live one day…

(Chorus)

I’ve spent 20-odd years of my life never living a day alive